Kegerator Under the Tree

10. Raises Home Value
If you plan to sell your house one day in the future, then explain to your wife that having a built-in kegerator will only enhance the perceived value of your house.

9. For Medical Reasons
As this article shows, beer helps prevent prostate cancer. No need to mention the coffee part unless you like it. The exercise portion is taken care of in #8.

8. Lifting Kegs = Exercise
Your wife will most likely roll her eyes when she hears this one, so it is your duty to make her carry the first keg into the house.

7. Saves Space in the Refrigerator
There will now be more room for whatever it is your wife wants to fill the kitchen refrigerator with, like yogurt.

6. Kegs are Eco-Friendly
A kegerator means no more wasting bottles and cans. Even if you do recycle them, it is still conserving more to not use them at all.
      6a. Conserves Water
      Obviously if there is draft beer in the house you’ll be more likely to drink that
      instead of a glass of water. I wouldn’t go as far as telling her you’ll shower in
      beer though.

5. Quid Pro Quo
Strongly hint she’ll only get the gift at the top of her wish list if you get yours.
Note: Do not hint that she won’t get any gift at all. This will only make her angry and vindictive.

4. You’ll Spend More Time at Home
She won’t be wondering where you are or why you’re still at the bar because you won’t be out.

3. Saves Money
No, really. It does.

2. She’ll be a Legend
Not only will you be forever grateful, your friends will revere her. Their wives will be jealous. She will be known as “The Greatest Wife in the World.”

1. You’ll Share
It might be considered your present, but unless she gets you a mini kegerator, you will gladly let her enjoy the benefits of having draft beer in your home.
Note: This should be obvious, but this reason only works if your wife drinks beer. And she should, because that same article on prostate cancer above also mentions that beer may help prevent breast cancer.